50-Year-Old Man's YouTube Shorts Comment Level lol

Born in '74. My middle school field trip cost 15,000 won. After my father abandoned us, my mother—carrying five kids and poverty—went to the village chief to borrow money for my field trip. "If you can't afford it, just don't send him. Why do what everyone else does?" she said, but Mom endured all kinds of ridicule and somehow scraped together that 15,000 won. That night, she cried alone by the storage jars. Years passed, and now in my 50s raising my own kids, I'm finally starting to understand my mother's heart. I'm finally realizing that for my mother, pride was a luxury she couldn't afford. On field trip day, I didn't go. I wandered around the mountains and fields without turning in the money, and when I came home that evening, I made an excuse: "Mom, I get motion sickness, I don't think I can go. The teacher said he'd refund the money." But Mom knew. That autumn night, she cried alone by the storage jars again, so sorrowfully. Is that what love is? Is that what being a child is? Even after giving everything, not being able to give more—is that what parents do, hitting their chests and swallowing tears? Today especially, I miss my mother. Mom, are you doing well there? I miss you every single day. At this age, every time I watch something like this, I long for you. I made money, hated being poor, worked myself to death as an excuse—and couldn't even hold those rough hands warmly once. My heart aches. In the next life, come back as my mom. Then I'll tell you with all my heart that I love you. I miss you, I long for you. I still haven't deleted my mom's phone number even though the owner changed. When I'm old and leaving this world, come meet me. I'm going to bring a plate of mackerel sashimi—Mom's favorite.